Holding My Breath

Since writing an earlier article on the Assumption of Mary, I've reflected more on detachment. Why is it so hard? How can we do it when we don’t really want to? Anyone who has left a job they loved because of retirement or disability knows how frightening and disorienting detachment can feel. How will they occupy their time meaningfully now? Who are they now? The change can feel devastating.

Detachment

In my own life, I'm learning that detachment doesn’t have to mean completely ceasing to do the things I enjoy or forgetting the people important to me. I’m realizing that it can be more about creating space for receiving and less about losing. I only understand that when I finally turn to Jesus in prayer. Sometimes I sit on the floor with a picture of Jesus and/or Mary nearby. I tell them honestly about my feelings, fears about letting go, and the outcomes I desire. “Jesus and Mary, I give you access to those. I ask you to put your hand on my heart and love me right there where it’s hardest to let go.” I close my eyes and open my hands, as if I'm ready to receive. And, dear Reader, they do come, listen, and love. I ask them what they want to tell me about letting go. Often, that comes later (when I’m quiet enough to hear). While I don't always leave prayer with answers, I almost always leave with peace. That itself is a gift.

Space to Breathe

The beauty and peace of personal encounter with Jesus and Mary emboldens me to trust them: detachment becomes the only option to receiving the grace that’s coming. Sometimes it’s a tentative “yes” while holding my breath and practicing patience. My timing and theirs can be different and yet Jesus and Mary are at work in our lives when we let them in. Their gifts have often surpassed my imagination. Detaching from things that we don't need to hold on to can give us space to breathe where we desperately need it. That can feel scary because letting go opens us to feeling vulnerable.

What's that for you?
What could you let go of in your heart or life that would give you space to breathe...to live better somehow?
What's stopping you from bringing that to Jesus and Mary and letting them love and free you right there?