Humility in Forgiving
Forgiveness is never easy. When Peter asked Jesus how often we should forgive, Jesus answered: “I say to you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times” (Mt 18:22). In other words, forgiveness is not about numbers but about living with an open heart.
Sometimes forgiveness can look a bit like a show, spoken quickly or very publicly. But true forgiveness is quieter. It grows out of humility.
What does humility mean?
Humility means being honest with myself. I am not perfect. I make mistakes, and I depend on God’s loving forgiveness every day. When I forgive someone else, I am not standing above them, handing out kindness from a higher place. I am standing beside them, as one person, humbly forgiving another.
This is why, at the beginning of Mass, we bow our heads and pray the Confiteor, striking our breast as a sign of humility and honesty before God:
“I confess to almighty God
and to you, my brothers and sisters,
that I have greatly sinned,
in my thoughts and in my words,
in what I have done and in what I have failed to do,
through my fault, through my fault,
through my most grievous fault;
therefore I ask blessed Mary ever-Virgin,
all the Angels and Saints,
and you, my brothers and sisters,
to pray for me to the Lord our God.”
That simple prayer, and the gesture of striking our breast, remind us: forgiveness begins with humility, with acknowledging my own failings and asking for mercy.
Real forgiveness doesn’t mean pretending nothing happened. It doesn’t take away the hurt right away. It often needs time, prayer, and honesty. St. Paul writes: “As the Lord has forgiven you, so must you also do” (Col 3:13).
The best example is Jesus himself. On the cross he prayed: “Father, forgive them, they know not what they do” (Lk 23:34). No show, no big words, just a humble prayer. They divided his garments by casting lots.r
Forgiveness with humility has a special power. It can free both the one who forgives and the one who is forgiven. It can give peace again to a heart that has been restless.
In this Jubilee Year of Hope, may we learn that forgiveness is not about making a statement in public but about finding the courage to forgive quietly, with a humble heart.
